Morning All
Apologies for the prolonged absence (must do better, and stop promising to do better).
Last night the Shed hosted a small game of Fist Full of Lead set in the early stages of WW2. For those unfamiliar Walmington on Sea is the ficticious setting of the BBC comedy series called Dads Army. Commanded by the pompous Captain Mainwaring, the platoon of aged local volunteers do their very best to thwart the potential of the Nazi Germany invasion. The TV series is beautifully written, a fantastic cast and so very British in its humour. Our little game tried to do homage to this programme, albeit somewhat more bloody and brutal.
As a background the two sides were each given a short briefing shown below but in essence German Paratroopers have been spotted landing to the north of the village and the alarm of the church bells has been sounded. Scattered across the village are various bystanders and other characters that may hinder or help each of the opposing sides.
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| The Village of Walmington on Sea |
German Briefing
Two squads of Fallschirmjager have been dropped into the heart of Sussex
to retrieve some classified Top Secret despatches pertaining to the British
defences along the south coast.
Your local agents were able to send out a
message that they had deposited the documents in a red ‘garbled word’ box in
Walmington on Sea. Unfortunately they did not say which one. Your mission is
simple retrieve the documents from the red box and exit the table to the East .
Notes:
The two squads of paratroopers (each 6 strong) will enter the table from North
or the North East corner.
A downed Luftwaffe crew are in the vicinity, if you can
escort them off the table then bonus points will be awarded. The Luftwaffe crew
will be made known to you if you pass within 6” of them
Two of the locals are in fact secret Nazi sympathisers and
will render assistance. Again these will become known to you if you pass within
6” of them.
Your orders are very simple do not antagonise the locals
(unless in uniform), we will need their support and compliance when we invade
Britain
British Briefing
Don’t Panic, Don’t Panic – the church bells are ringing.
Paratroopers have been spotted landing to the North of the town.
1. Muster your men, fortunately a number of the platoon are
already in the village hall doing drill practice. Others are elsewhere
2. Call HQ – unfortunately the phone in the hall is not
working. Send a runner to post office to make the call.
3. Defend the key points of the village
4. Observe and question anybody suspicious
Mainwaring, Wilson, Pike and Godfrey along with two other men are in the Village Hall. All have rifles bar Mainwaring who has a pistol and Pike who is armed with a Tommy Gun.
The remainder of the Platoon are outside the Black Bull pub and Jones is locking up his shop.
The Bystanders
Mr Hodges (ARP and Greengrocer) will ‘cause any British figure within 6" to lose their turn by being obstructive,
he is just being difficult but is not a German spy
Colonel Mustard and his Gamekeeper – they will
defend Mustard Manor against anybody entering the grounds - furthermore should Mustard venture to the safety of the church his gamekeeper will steal the Bentley parked outside and exit table
The Hollywood Film Crew – currently filming the stain glass windows in the church. these are in fact American
agents observing British defences. They will not get involved unless attacked directly by either side. All are armed with pistols.
Vicar – extremely nosy and spotted a secretive
looking man hiding a leather satchel in a phone box but cannot remember which one. Should
he be within 12” of either Wilson or Mainwaring he will call them over and tell
them what he has seen. The man was wearing a dark trench coat and black hat.
The Verger – His wife is being held hostage by
the wounded Luftwaffe crew and he doesn’t know what to do. If approached by
Mainwaring or Wilson (within 6”) he will start crying and the tell them that
the Luftwaffe crew are holed up in his house with his wife
The Turk – just a tourist visiting the village but looks suspicious
The Thugs – These chaps have been drinking all
day in the pub and are up for a fight with anybody !
The Butterfly Capturer – trying to catch a
spotted yellow admiral in the memorial garden. Completely harmless but he has a foreign sounding accent, could it be Dutch, Danish or even German?
The Policeman – He is on his way to deal with the
Thigs in the pub. He will support the British against the Germans
The German Spy – currently walking towards the
station with a telephone directory in his case. He has also sabotaged all the phone boxes in the village so Mainwaring cannot call HQ from one of these. Only the post office line is working.
Mrs Fox – currently sunning herself in the
Garden
The Pigs - These pigs have been cooped up in the yard for several days, they are very hungry and very aggressive. They will attack anybody entering the yard.
The Pantomime Cow. Out by the fields near mustard manor is a strange looking cow. This is in fact a member of the Home guard in disguise. He will only be revealed if a German comes into view.
The Lufwaffe Crew - Four crew members of whom three are already wounded. All armed with pistols. They are currently hiding out in the Vergers house with his wife as a hostage. They will only attempt to move if friendly Germans move within 6" of them.
The Bystanders are all activated each turn with their own card - it is for the umpire to determine what their course of action will be.
Our Adventure
It all began on a beautiful summers day in Little England when the sky was filled with the floating shapes of parachutes. The toll of the church bells called the village to attention, this was the second time this had happened as earlier in the day a flaming Dornier was seen crashing a few miles to the south.
Captain Mainwaring frustrated that half the platoon had failed to arrive for muster, he berated Wilson and then reached for the phone on his desk. The line was dead . He had to notify HQ that he was under attack. Commanding Wilson to take Pike and the other members of the squad to get the townsfolk safe into the church he marched out with Godfrey towards the post office.
Meanwhilst Privates Walker and Fraser along with a few other members of the platoon were have quick pint and a smoke when the alarm went off. Fraser was concerned, we are all doomed he muttered and thinking on his feet thought the upstairs of the Pub might give him a better line of sight to what might be happening to the north..
Just down the road Corporal Jones was locking up the Butchers when he saw a shifty looking man in a black trench coat hobble by. He called out to him to halt. The man failed to do so and Jones could hear the gutteral German accent cursing him for interrupting his business. Jones levelled his rifle and once more called the man to stop.
By now Fraser had made it into the pub and outside the window he saw several German troopers crossing the railway line. He cursed and readied his weapon. Peering over the window sill he opened fire. The War had come to Walmington on Sea !
Jones once more called for the dark coated man to stop, realising this chap was paying him no attention Jones fired his .303. His shot ricochet off the rail crossing gates and winged the fleeing suspect causing him to collapse in the road.
Hearing the sound of gunfire ahead Mainwaring and Godfrey hussled their way forward towards their post office objective. As they passed the gates of Mustard Manor they could see the Colonel and his gatekeeper out on the steps of the grand house. Clearly spooked by the sound of gunfire in the village the gamekeeper raised his shotgun and shot sat Mainwaring. Both barrels missed and Mainwaring cowering behind the gate called to the Colonel to make his way to the Church for safety.
Fraser and the rest of his squad were now in a desperate firefight with the advancing Germans at the rear of the pub. Private Cheesemen ventured into the pub yard only to be assaulted by the two very drunken thugs.
As Jones questioned what he had just done he could see a truck quickly approaching from the station carpark. It was full of German Paratroopers !. As the vehicle moved up the road the poor chap Jones had shot failed top move out the way.....squelch. Jones fearing for his life ducked behind his van.
By now Private Walker had hotwired the coal truck sitting outside the Pub and was keen to get round to Jonesy's butchers to give him some help. He put the truck into gear and floored the pedal. Screeching round the corner Walker's last thoughts were thinking this was not such a good idea as he could now see the German filled truck heading his way at full speed. With neither side able to brake in time the two vehicles crashed head on. Both drivers exiting their windscreens simultaneously. Jones could only stare as the German occupants of the truck lay mangled and wounded in the carnage of the accident.
Mainwaring and Godfrey pushed on into the village and hearing the sounds of gunfire from the pub he directed Godfrey to see if his medical skills were needed inside the building. As he turned into the street he passed PC Copper who was also rushing to the pub.
Seargant Wilson could not understand all the commotion going on to the North but he had his orders, get to the church to protect the civilians. Seeing the local Jam salesmans van by the side of the road and the keys still in the ignition Wilson climbed in and commandeered the vehicle. Pike along with the rest of the men climbed into the back.
With the Gunfire now erupting in the north the American Film director realised this was his chance for some serious camera work, perhaps an opportunity to win an award? Ushering his crew through the church gates they stepped out onto the road ......looking right they saw no approaching traffic. The classic mistake - in England we drive on the left hand side of the road. The Director remembered this just as Wilson in the Jam laden truck proceeded run over him and the rest of the crew. The smell of strawberry jam permeated the area around the church
...horrified by what he had done Wilson jumped out of the truck and into the garden by the side of the road. With his uniform coated in strawberry preserve he drove the waiting pigs into a frenzy. Wilson now shocked and horrified struggled back over the fence and promptly feinted.
The fight for the pub's rear yard raged on. The combatants now joined by PC copper and the brutish thug realised his best chance of redemption being to attack the Nazi invaders. His mate had already called it a day and fled the scene. With fists, truncheons and rifle butts flying the Germans steadily got the upper hand. Throughout the ensuing melee Godfrey worked his way around the room patching up friend and foe alike.
Mainwaring finally reached the Post Office whereupon he called HQ and alerted them to the dangers in Walmington. Reinforcements were on their way ! When was another question....
Private Pike and the rest of the squad in the back of the Jam truck slowly emerged and only to be directed into the grounds of the churchyard. It was at this point the Verger could hold back no longer, and he burst into tears. He explained that for the past few hours his wife was being held hostage by a German air crew and were holed up in his house next door to the church. Feeling incredibly brave Pike drew back the bolt on his tommy gun and poked his head over the wall in the direction of the vergers house.
As he was about to call out to surrender a breathless Warden Hodges materialise from behind a gravestone and began to berate the poor boy for not doing enough to save the village and that where was Napoleon when we was finally needed. This was the straw that broke the camels back, Pike stood up and called for pilots to surrender. Nein was the terse response, so Pike pulled the trigger spraying the vergers house in bullets. The hail of lead shattered the top floor windows a further injured the Luftwaffe crew. Mercifully the vergers wife was unscathed. Once more Pike called out for their surrender, secretly hoping for another negative response. This was all too much for the German aircrew and a white sheet was draped from the window.
Corporal Jones, nursing a broken ankle, reloaded his rifle and took another pot shot at the Jerry cowering in the mangled truck ahead. He could hear Mainwaring shouting words on encouragement from the post office. Jones caught sight of another German heading his way and pulled the trigger. The Paratrooper dropped stone cold dead but as Jones fumbled with bolt on his rifle his world went dark as he was clubbed down from behind.
As the dust began to settle Private Godfrey could see the Germans hastily retreating from the pub. One trooper wrenched open the door of the outside phone box a grabbed a sealed brown envelope. Whatever it was the Germans had it. Godfrey turned back to nurse the wounded and dying.
Mainwaring could see the remaining Germans fleeing across the fields to the east, his webley revolver useless at this range. Might Private 'wehatshisname' save the day? As the troopers fled across the field and stream with the priceless documents they were stunned to see the rear half of a cow stand erect and point a rifle at them. A bullet whistled past but before a second shot could be fired the Nazis hit the dense undergrowth....with the secret plans in their possession could the Third Reich conquer England?
more soon
